Being Single

I haven't blogged in awhile. This is because I'm going through this phase where I feel quieter and more secluded and like I don't have anything important to say. There could be several reasons for this.
1. I'm too busy. All the time. I don't have time to talk.
2. I forget to. Being a senior has my mind on so many different things, it's no surprise that I'm lost in my head all the time.
3. I'm too tired. I work 5-10 most nights, and then add having to read chapters from my Anatomy book, and other random homework crap, and texting til my thumbs are sore... Yeah. I should sleep more. I don't get to bed until well after midnight most nights.
4. Everybody's got their special somebody, leaving me with my nobody to realize I have no idea who I am without my friends who are off and away with their special somebodies.

So, that brings me to this post's title. How exactly am I dealing with single life? I'll put it this way:

Why Being Single Rocks:

• It's all I've ever known. Yeah, I've had crushes, and then a few people who have had crushes on me, but I really don't think it's ever been mutual in either case. Mostly because I think a lot of people are just creepy, and stuff. So, I've never really been in a relationship, excluding that weird week during the beginning of freshman year I "dated" a guy I had met at a concert. But that doesn't count. With all that being said, being in a relationship would be a whole new world to me, and who's to say I'm ready for that? Because as of right now, I don't even know.
• Time. Already, time is a huge issue with me. There's just not enough hours in a day, not enough days in a week, and definately not enough days in a month. So, throw a boyfriend into that, and who knows? The world could explode. Or my brain. Whatever.
• Independance. I've always been really independant, even when I was little. I like it like that.
• Truthfully, I don't have to shave my legs. Who's going to care if I don't? Not me.
• I can have an amazing relationship with God. What's stopping me? Besides time, and all that?

Why Being Single Sucks Big Ones:

• I've got all this cuddle and nobody but my sweater cat and Summer to share it with.
• Those days when I need to talk to somebody, and everybody is busy would definately go by a lot smoother, I would think. Since there'd be someone who'd talk to me.
• Adventures are not fun alone. Adventures would be awesome dates.
• I like it when I get butterflies in my stomach. It'd be nice to know I can make someone feel them too.
• I can't feel like something is wrong with me anymore.

This stuff has always been really confusing. I really can't say if I'd be happier single or with someone. I'm sure I'm fine either way. As long as I don't end up alone with 12 cats. I probably won't. God just hasn't brought my somebody to me. Or to my attention. He will when he knows I'm ready.

He loves us.

Six!

I haven't done one of these in fooorrreeevvveeerrr.  So. Here goes.

Six Places.

1. London.
2. Tokyo.
3. Paris.
4. New York City.
5. Colorado.
6. The rest of the world.

I reaaallly want to travel to the ends of the earth and back. It'd be the tops to go backpacking in Europe. Just because I'd be so lost it'd be ridiculous. I'd probably take a couple or more people with me, so we can all be lost together. Being lost is a bonding experience, you know. Colorado is on there because it has to be the best state in the USA. The weather is amazing, it actually snows. And mountains. And real trees. Ah. I'm going to live there when I'm old and "crazy". I'm just going to act crazy. I'll gum people. It'll be amazing. I'm so excited.

He Loves Us.

Rant #2

Recently, I've kind of realized how much I just hate people. Not necessarily everybody, and it's not a hatred that's all "Oh, I'm better than all these people and crap." Nah. It's just... I'm irritated. A lot. And maybe I don't even have the right to be irritated by this. But I dunno. I need to get it out of my system. Sorry if I hurt your feelings. But if you get hurt by this, I'm sure you needed to think about it anyways. So I'm benefitting you, in a way.

Let's say I tell you something funny. We laugh about it for awhile, and later we go on our ways. Then, a day later, or maybe even that very same day, I see you, sharing this something funny with someone else, and leaving me totally out of the conversation, knowing full well I've been in the same room with you for like two and a half hours. On top of that, it's not like this person is some random bloke off the street, either, but one of our mutual friends. This mutual friend is all "Oh my goodness. That's hilarious!!!" Suddenly, everybody is talking about it. And then someone comes up to me and is all "Herpa Derpa* told me this hilariously funny joke! *insert hilariously funny joke here* Aren't they just SO FRIGGEN COOL?" And I'm all quiet all like "... ha..ha... yeahhh.. that's really funny... even though.. you know... i told them that in the first place.." However, by this point, whoever I'm talking to is uninterested in what I have to say because this happens every day of my life now, and they think it'd be alright to turn to you (not even halfway through of what I'm saying) for more of my funny jokes.

Do you not feel mean? Or rude, sort of? I know I feel left out and taken advantage of. Wouldn't you stop to think about that? Or are you just so absorbed in your life as a celebrity that you just don't really care all that much?

Maybe it's your dominant personality type. I actually just have absolutely no idea what could wrong with you. You might just be evil and self centered. Or you're just attention-whoring. Which seems to be the case in most people.

And this is just one of the examples of things people like this have done. This isn't mentioning the "Oh, I'll hang out with you only because it benefits me, as in... Can I have a ride to so and so's house after we do this?" or even doing things that other people do because you think that all those other people will enjoy you more if you look cool like that other gal who is just insecure and as humble as can be about how awesome she really is. But they decide to do the same thing, and just make it more public, and just louder, to where people agree that they are the king of the friggen planet.

Originality is precious. It defines a person in a way that nothing else can. I believe that God made each and every one of us different for a reason. I'm sure he didn't mean for quiet little Billy's individuality to be stolen away by some random attention seeker.

But just look at the world today. It's full of people who want to be exactly like one another. Sterotypes like jock, hipster, and goth are blown out of proportion, each person thinking they have to fit into one category or another so that they may be accepted by society.

Society sucks.

Don't listen to it. Don't follow the crowd. If the crowd was marching to the left with their feet going left, right, left, right, left, then why don't you start jumping around, or even just simply walking the other way, exiting the crowd?

I'm being myself. You should be yourself. Herpa Derpa should be him/herself (I'm not too sure what gender a Herpa would be.)

And, don't say that you don't know who you are, because that sounds like a personal problem. Fix it yourself. Everybody else has to do it too at some point in their life.

*Using the name "Herpa Derpa" is a thing I saw on Tumblr. I didn't come up with it myself. That's someone else's awesome.

He Loves Us. Each of us Individually.

Mmyeah.

I'm not even sure where to start, since I left off so long ago. Since our last little chat (well, it's more of a one-sided chat), I've... seen Gungor and David Crowder again, dyed my hair, discovered some crazy awesome bands, and have been getting lazier and lazier when it comes to school. I believe that's called Senioritis. Whatever it is... I've got a terrible case of it.

Gungor and David Crowder. I didn't get to meet them like last time (talking about Gungor. I'd probably be insanely happy if I ever met David Crowder. His beard is rad.) It was during David Crowder's 7 tour, and Gungor was doing an acoustic set, with only Lisa, Michael, and this dude who beatboxed and played cello at the same time. My soul just keeps breaking off piece by piece, and just stays at the site of sweet concerts. There's a piece in Austin (Coldplay), one in Snyder (where we first saw Gungor), and another in Lubbock (where this last concert was). Soon enough, I'll be like Voldemort. With a small broken soul. By the way, sitting at a concert between Gary and his older brother is like... the best concert experience ever. They're all singing along and just.. being generally awesome. Angel voices they have. Yoda I am.

"Dyed my hair". What? Yeah. I'm not done with it yet. I bleached it with the help of Summer and Alexis. It didn't really do all that much the first time. It's a looot lighter, but didn't turn blonde. I'm redoing it on Wednesday. I wanna be blonde for Halloween so I can legitmately dress up like Luna Lovegood. My costume gets here the 20th. I'm so excited. (Nerd.) Anyways. After Halloween, I plan on dying it red. Like this:

Because I'm bored.

Sad storytime? I believe so.

So, I was at work the other day, and this seemingly homeless man walks up, and I go outside the carhop booth to see if he'd like something to eat. He's asking me how much a cheeseburger is, counting his change, and I tell him "$3.70" He gives me exactly that, and I pay for his tax because I'm nice like that. He was a nice fellow, one of my favorite kinds: Old, kinda Jazzy, and black. The entire time I was talking to him, I couldn't help but to notice that it looked like he had sunscreen that he hadn't quite rubbed in all the way on his face. When his burger was done, I went out and gave it to him, and noticed that it wasn't sunscreen on his face, but paint. He had painted his face white.

That just gets to me. What could have happened that made him think he had to do that? I wonder who hurt him. Or who made him feel he isn't worthy. This world is sick, and that's just the end of it.

I'll try to write more often, folks. Butttt.... I'm having trouble not spending all my free time sleeping.

He Loves Us.
I hope everyone is able to one day realize that.

My Coldplay Experience.

September 16, 2011. The day of the Coldplay concert in Austin as stated in this post:

Screaming in the Ladies Room

With that post being written in May, you can see that it's been quite awhile that I've been anticipating this day. It was totally worth it. Every single second. Now, 3 days after the concert... I'm still very happy. It was indeed the best day of my life.

I believe we can start with the day we left. We left the Thursday before the concert after school. Yes, we skipped school Friday. Yes, it was awesome and rebellious. Yes, it was Homecoming. Hah.

The drive over there was like:

Then, we slept. At either 1 or 2 in the morning. I can't quite remember. The drive from here to Austin is ridiculous.

The next morning, I awake before Summer, and I get dressed. Then I go and bother her, wake her up, and she gets dressed eventually. We go outside, and Marie's little adopted daughter is all "Take a picture of me with this weird purple grass!"

So I do:

Then, we're in the car, and we're heading to Austin. (Marie lives in Bastrop, about an hour from there.) Marie's little adopted daughter then demands that Summer take a picture of me and her together.

So she does:

We're cute. So, then, we're at Zilker Park, and Autumn and I are freaking out all like "holy crud buckets. We're alone... with 30,000 other weirdos... in a giant park, in the capitol of Texas" while we were walking on the foot bridge that for some reason had a picture of Optimus Prime stamped on it, labeled "Optimist Prime". (Fail.)

Then, we're in the park. The grass is like carpet. It's in a way like turf, but without the weird bead things. And it's squishy. So after this...

...we removed our shoes. Yes. That's a raindrop on my camera lens. For some reason, it decided to rain right when we arrived, making our hair look like a complete mess, then stop about ten minutes later. So everyone's all "Well, thanks, sky."

The park was HUGE. There were so many people there. And for some reason, they were all dressed super cute. The best part, though, was that you could see the cityscape while you were walking around. Like so:

It was so pretty. Like... insanely. And yes, unfortunately, that's a bar. But, the cool thing was that they limited everyone to only two drinks (except water and soday, duh.) So nobody was actually walking around all drunk and stupid. Unless they had a super low tolerance. But whatever. Speaking of water, though. They had this brand called H2O. It's in a paper bottle. Like cardboard, except not. It was so cool. I really wanna know where you get that from.

Here's some more pictures:

Just to say how many people were there.

The AMC stage, where Coldplay played later that day.

That's yarn. Yeah.

SO MANY PEOPLE.

We went up to the stage around 6:30ish. Coldplay played at 8:10.

Bright Eyes. They played right before Coldplay. I've never heard of them, but they were fantastic. And yes. That's a signer. Don't ask questions, because I don't know either.

Bright Eyes.

Setting up for Coldplay.

The circle light things are now onstage. Things are about to get crunk.

Chris Martin's piano was put up.

So, then we're waiting for like forever, and this weird rap music starts up, and the signer lady starts getting crunk like:



I apologize for the language. But that was dang hilarious.

Then, all the sudden, there's this crazy music all like:

I thought it was just some random music, so I stopped the tape. Then...

Hurts Like Heaven, in case you're wondering.Then it was Yellow. I'm not sure about the order of the rest of it, but it included Us Against The World (I lovelovelovelove that one), The Scientist, The Hardest Part, Violet Hill, Viva La Vida, Every Teardrop Is A Waterfall, Fix You, Paradise, Lost!, and... a ton more. It was more than fantastic.

Sorry this one's like... 99% of Guy Berryman. He sexy. Nah. I actually was holding the camera above my head, and people were jumping and crap, so. Guy Berryman.

I kept getting hit with those giant balloon ball things. Hence why the video is a ton of shimmy shake. And Chris Martin doing a weird dance thing at the begining.

This one's my favorite. Once it comes out on CD (24 October 2011) I'm going to die. Either that... Or... Yeah. I'll die. (BTdub... I'm in love with William Champion. He sings like an angel. I cried.)

This is my favorite picture out of all of them. Johnny Buckland with the hat, and Chris Martin singing his heart out. I'm pretty sure I professed my love to both of them... multiple times during the 1 1/2 hour concert. Things like "ILOVEYOU!" and "GOJOHNNYGO!!" (during the guitar solos. He's so cool, that Johnny Buckland. He's like Ringo Starr. He has a weird nose. But he's so cool.)

 And then... They bowed. It was over. They left the stage after we called them back on. Encores are amazing. Really. Especially if they last 30 minutes, and consist of... all things beautiful. Holy cow.

Coldplay, being my favorite band, has made my life complete. If only I could meet them now. Hah. Coldplay, to me, is special. When I'm feeling broken, I listen to Fix You. When I'm looking at the stars and how they shine for me, Yellow is more than appropriate. When I feel panicky, I turn on Don't Panic. It only makes sense that they make me so happy. Ah. I'm so glad I was able to experience this. Even if... Three days later, my voice is still lost in that crowd of over 17,000 people.

He loves us.



Taking a Walk

Yesterday, the skies of Texas decided to be amazing and produce my favorite weather (sunny with a high of 75). It was actually cloudy, like it was going to rain, but whatever. It never rained. Drought.

But, with the weather.. nearly perfect, I decided to take a walk. I took with me: a water bottle, The Hunger Games, and a camera. I live right next to a park, so I went there, searching for 1. beauty, and 2. a place to hide away and read for a few hours. Peace, pretty much. My house smelled of the brisket my mother made for dinner, and my stomach was just.. no.

Hang on. I need Honeycombs.

Mmkay.*crunch* Here, in chronological order, are the photos I captured while taking my stroll through nice weather. I'll photoshop them later.

 A random river bed I found. There was a red and white striped knitted hat there. I think... we all know where Waldo went now. Poor guy.

He makes beautiful things, eh?

He loves us.

P.S. Keep Bastrop, Texas in your prayers. There's been a huge fire, and a lot of people lost their homes. :(

It All Ends.

Am I basing the start of my senior year of high school off of the movie poster for the last Harry Potter movie? Yes. Yes I am. Makes sense, though. Harry Potter was my entire life. I read the first book in like second grade.

Insane. Year 12. I'm thinking... My youth is gone. Kind of.

How was the first day of senior year? Weird. Like I don't feel like it actually happened. It didn't feel like a begining. It was more like jumping into old habits. It wasn't as big of a deal as I thought it'd be. I just feel old. That's it.

I'm looking forward to the rest of this school year, though. It has the potential of being downright amazing. I'm taking cool classes. By that, I mean... there's cool people in every single one of them. For instance... I've got Summer in every single class this year besides 2nd period. But, in there, I have a computer, Captain Kirk, and Jason. Jason and I are going to be best buddies by Christmas. It'll be awesome.

Marching band is going to be insanely amazing this year. Like... seriously. We started learning drills tonight, andddd... It was so cool. Except some of the little men of freshness wouldn't listen to me when I told them they were four steps too far back. I'm not one for telling people what to do. Except in Student Council. But that's a different atmosphere. I'm actually good at that. I suck at walking, much less in synchronization with 110+ other kids... while playing an instrument. But it's fun trying. I'm not too shabby, just... not excellent.

I am way tired. I hope all the rest of you folks who went back to school had a nice day. Hopefully it wasn't too bothersome.

He loves us.